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The name's Peter. From New Jersey. 22 years old. Absurdly sarcastic. Read much more in my "about me" by clicking on the link below. =)
Side note: Many people are wondering why there are no "non-anon" questions on my blog. It's because I answer them privately so my blog doesn't get overwhelmed with questions.
Side side note: I don't do promos.
Side side side note: I don't reblog unless the post is something I really feel needs to be seen.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
Mom: Can I borrow $500?
Me: No.
Mom: Just like that?
Me: Yes.
Mom: You don't even want to know what it's for?
Me: No, because I can tell by the retarded look on your face that it's for something stupid.
Mom: It's not stupid! It's for a down payment on an in-house tanning bed.
Me:
Mom:
Me: *Walks away*
Mom: Where the fuck are you going?
Me: To the county courthouse to have your name removed from my birth certificate.
When someone catches me checking them out, I’m like…
Excuse me while I go find the nearest corner to die in.
The embarrassing moment when you get that random shiver…
…and wind up looking like a total retard.
