------------------
The name's Peter. From New Jersey. 22 years old. Absurdly sarcastic. Read much more in my "about me" by clicking on the link below. =)
Side note: Many people are wondering why there are no "non-anon" questions on my blog. It's because I answer them privately so my blog doesn't get overwhelmed with questions.
Side side note: I don't do promos.
Side side side note: I don't reblog unless the post is something I really feel needs to be seen.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
*Landlord at my house to check the malfunctioning smoke alarms*
Me: Yeah, but all of the fucking smoke alarms were going off last night every 10 minutes when I was in bed and there's no way to shut them off. I fucking need my sleep and your stupid, cheap smoke alarms fucked it up. Do you know how it is to lie in bed all night listening to "BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP FUCKING BEEP BEEP!?"
Landlord: Well, was there a fire or smoke?
Me: Yes. There was a raging fire spreading through the house in the middle of the night, but I was too tired to fight it and figured I'd just lie in bed and wait for God to put it out. Luckily, he did and was also kind enough to rebuild the house and replace all of my burned belongings.
Landlord:
Me:
Landlord:
Me: What the FUCK is wrong with you?
